Ord VS Tyg
By Trevor Lake and Robert Brown

Ord and Tyg are copyright their respective owners.

"Hello, folks, Jumbo here with my partner, Horner.  We got a match here 
with some very high stakes.  We're in the finals of the Amateur Aquatic 
Fighting Open here, and we have two very strong contenders for for the 
title of winner here.  Horner, do tell us about who we've got here and 
the prize."

"Our first competitor is Tyg from the Shirt Tales.  He's fought long and 
hard to get to the finals, with each match being harder for him than the 
last.  But he's survived and looks as primed as ever to make the jump to 
the big leagues.  Standing in his way however is one big dragon in Ord 
from the Dragon Tales contingent.  Unlike Tyg, all of Ord's victories 
have been quick and easy with that lethal finisher of his.  He might 
have some more trouble with Tyg, however.  What do you think?"

"The difficulty for Tyg through this will make him more difficult for 
Ord to beat, but will it be enough.  Oh, by the way, the prize for 
winning this is election into the main juniors league, so there will be 
some good motivation here."

"On that we agree, for a change.  Now then, we know the prize and the 
fighters, so while we wait for them to make their last second 
preparations, why don't you tell us the rules, Jumbo?"

"Well.... um... not many.  In fact, the only real rule here is that 
they're using full gear here.  Other than that, just about anything goes 
once they hit the water.  Good, looks like they're about ready to start, 
at oppisite ends of the tank... and they hit water.  Wow, Ord probably 
splashed a gallon or two of water out when he hit."

"At least that much, if not more.  Tyg's going on the offensive right 
away, striking at Ord with everything he's got.  But Ord just keeps 
shoving him away, not fighting back.  What's he up to?"

"Honestly, I'm not sure, Horner.  We were only here for this, and we 
haven't really had a chance to see them before.  All our info is based 
on what we were told.  Damn, Tyg's offense isn't doing any good as it 
stands.  What the hell is that dragon waiting for?"

"I don't know, but as Ord turns another flurry away you can see Tyg 
getting frustrated.  I don't know what's frustrating him more though, is 
it that Ord just keeps pushing him back, or is it that Ord's not doing 
anything?"

"Tyg's still trying... he deserves points for persistence, at least.  
Hold on, there... Tyg just pulled a fake on his much larger opponent, 
and finally nailed him one in the head!  But this may not have been 
worth it... Ord's just grabbed him."

"This looks bad....but wait, Tyg buys himself a reprieve with that 
'Boing' of his.  The shockwave nailed Ord right in the face making him 
let go.  But that's one of Tyg's biggest attacks.  If that only made him 
let go, I fear for Tyg's well being here."

"And Tyg seems to have gotten the same thought, as he's now backing off 
from the recovering dragon... why doesn't he just do it again?  Any 
thoughts, Horner?"

"Well, from what I understand, he can't do it that often.  Still, he 
looks spooked, even more so now that Ord is finally on his feet and 
making his way toward Tyg."

"Well, more like upright, seeing as he's floating in water... anyhow, 
Tyg's trying to swim off, but Ord's catching up.  (A minute passes)  
Finally, Ord grabs on to one of his feline's ankles and is reeling him 
in... let's see if Tyg has any more cute tricks."

"Seems like Tyg is trying to get a hold of Ord's regulator, but Ord is 
just casually swatting his attempts away.  This is demeaning....oh no, 
this looks like it could be even worse than that!"

"Oh, damn.... there's a massive bubbling around the two of them, Ord 
just unleashed the most massive fart I've ever seen in my life... and 
I'm an elephant!"

"I almost swear I smell that thing over here.  I can't see anything, but 
we both know Tyg's as good as dead.  This match is over."

"It's finally, clearing up, and as if there was any doubt, this match is 
so over.  Tyg was likely killed the second Ord let go.  What... Ord's 
taking the corpse of his opponent to the bottom.  What the hell is he 
planning?!  This match is over!"

"I don't know, but something tells me I really don't want to find it.  
It looks like he's setting him up for a point-blank fart, but what's the 
point of that?"

"Yeah, I gotta agree... can't believe I just said that.  Anyway, his 
face is straining quite a bit down there, and his breathing's a lot more 
heavier than usual... OH MY GOD... I am not seeing this..."

"*makes a noise of sounding rather sick*  Oh boy, no way.  He's shitting 
on him!  That's going way past what's needed here.  I'm gonna be 
sick....you take us out." *runs off, holding his mouth*

"Umm... yeah.  Well, Ord's in the juniors now... Speaking for Horner as 
well, this is Jumbo, over and out, and thank god.  (As they go off the 
air)  This is crazy!  They're not paying us enough for this shit!"